Saturday, January 7, 2012

Inspiration

I have been inspired. Two women have inspired me. I have never met them and they have never met me, but they have changed my life. One is a mother of five (soon to be six) children, who has suffered through illness (Hyperemesis gravidarum) with each of her pregnancies, and is an avid supporter of breastfeeding mothers. The other is a mother of 9, the youngest of which are triplet girls, who breastfeeds, baby-wears, and uses clothe diapers. Now I am just a mother of two (twins) and I struggled to breastfeed and stopped after 12 months. I use disposable diapers and I never baby-wore because I didn't think of it. I don't have much in common with these women and their lifestyles and in general I tend to be a conservative-crunchy mommy (if that makes any sense) however they have inspired me.

Jessica (a.k.a "The Leaky Boob") the-soon-to-be-mom-of-six was a great source of information and an encouragement to me while I was still breastfeeding. She also inspired me to start my own FB page for parents of twins, triplets, and higher order multiples ("Parenting Multiples"). We aren't a focused group like Jessica's which is for mainly breastfeeding support but rather for all parents of multiples (P.o.Ms), whatever their parenting style, however they choose to feed, diaper, raise their multiples. Because parenting multiples is quite unique from parenting a singleton, I felt like I should create a page for P.o.Ms. on which we can respectfully share our lives, experiences, questions, and advice with one another on a variety of topics.

Nicole whose blog aptly named "One Day At A Time" is the other mother who has been my inspiration. She blows my mind. As a new mom of twins I was led to believe that in many parenting issues I had no other option. Want to breastfeed? “Well, its very difficult and most mothers end up using formula”. Want to use cloth diapers? “Too messy, too much laundry, and too expensive for twins.” Want to co-sleep? “With twins?! HA!”, “ You'll have to cry-it-out”, “ You'll have to use a nanny”, “You'll have to get a full-time job to pay the bills”. You will ____. You won't ____. You can't ____. etc., etc., etc. Well Nicole is a woman who defies the norm. Defies the "won'ts" and the "can'ts". When I first "heard" of her it was because I stumbled upon a picture of her on someone's blog. She was breastfeeding two of her triplets and the third she had snuggled in a sling on her back. I thought, "Is this possible? Is this hope I feel?" And while my nursing days are over for my twins, my soul is glad to know of the possibilities for other moms of multiples (M.o.Ms) out there!

In the past mothers like these two women wouldn’t have inspired me, but rather filled me with guilt. Now the majority of my guilt was due to post-partum depression which is more common with M.o.Ms, and why PPD for M.o.Ms is also known as “Twin Shock”. But still, I would have felt like a failure as I listened to my boys cry-it-out, as I mixed another bottle of formula, as I had to call on friends to cook me meals, babysit, and do our laundry. But I have learned to have grace for myself, to surround myself with positive people (like Jessica and Nicole), and to lean on God for the rest. As I have read on Jessica’s FB community wall over and over again, “I did the best I could with the knowledge I had at the time”.

Now, inspiration must be followed by action otherwise its wasted. So if you find yourself in a low place dear reader follow my lead: pick yourself up, take a deep breath, smile and press on!

Not much of a blogger

So it turns out I'm not much of a blogger. I'm more of a "post-er" really. Check out my FB page "Parenting Multiples". Its a community for parents (grandparents, godparents, etc) of twins, triplets, and higher order multiples.
Maybe one day I'll blog again.